Ever met/ been involved with a narcissist? Statistically
most of us will meet one at some time in our lives. Narcissists are the
self-obsessed people who draw others into their lives only to feed their
enormous egos and to provide them with what they need most- attention,
prestige, money, material goods and a range of other services. They are always
there for you – when they need you.
Narcissists will prey on the kind, compassionate,
responsible and loyal people who value relationships. It may take these people
a long time to see the underlying lack of genuine reciprocation with which
their feelings are treated. But even very giving people eventually become aware
of the inequality of a relationship with a narcissist, whose need to feel
superior often manifests itself in criticism leading to contempt.
Narcissists, of course, are human, with human failings and
deserving of compassion and hopefully, constructive counselling. As I study the
characteristics of narcissism, I see much of the attributes of the ultimate
narcissist, Satan, from whom the evils of this world originate.
Satan was originally created by God as a powerful angel of
light, whose name was Lucifer, meaning “morning star”. He is described in the
Bible as beautiful and wise. (Ezekiel chapter 28). Instead of giving glory to
God, however, he became obsessed with himself to the point where he considered
himself greater than God (Isaiah chapter 14). As a result, God cast him from
his position in heaven. Lucifer the morning star became Satan, meaning “adversary”
– one who hates both God and all of God’s creation.
Satan is the prime example of narcissism at work. He is in
love with himself and seeks to gain power over and attention from others. Satan
always uses something personally attractive to the individual to gain their
attention. It may be money, or sexual behaviour, or prestige. It may be simply
being part of the crowd. The human heart, of course, is inherently drawn to sin
(Jeremiah 17:9). Satan will attract, then take. Little by little he will draw
you into a web of deceit, sinful behaviour, addictions and loss of
self-control. He will take your attention, time, money, family, marriage,
self-esteem and anything else he can. Ultimately, he will take your life if he is
able to.
What a contrast is the personhood of Jesus. Jesus is love
personified. He needs nothing. He gives everything, even down to giving His own
life for us. Jesus was there at the time of creation, Lord of all the universe,
yet He chose to take human form and live a humble life. On the cross He could
have called upon legions of angels to defend Him against those who beat and
mocked Him, yet He chose horrendous suffering and death. In obedience to His
Father’s will, Jesus honoured His Father and made a way for us to be reconciled
to God.
Jesus wants relationship with each of us, but, unlike Satan,
Jesus is always interested in our good. A life devoted to God, through Jesus
Christ and the indwelling Holy Spirit is the best life that one could possibly
live. Better than the best earthly father, Father God desires only to see each
of His created human children growing in wisdom and goodness. He is always with
us, always faithful to His word, always loving.
Jesus tells us that He saw Satan fall like lightening from
Heaven (Luke 10:18). Satan is a defeated foe. He has no claim on those who have
given their lives to Christ. The ultimate narcissist has no attraction for
those who have known true relationship with God and His Son Jesus.
